TweetFollow Us on Twitter

Bozo Manager
Volume Number:8
Issue Number:6
Column Tag:On the Lighter Side

Bozo Manager

By Gar, DataPak Software

Due to the increasing pressure to simplify the Mac Operating System, an unnamed source has given us an advance look at the next major System revisions:

The Bozo Manager

The purpose of the Bozo Manager is to simplify an otherwise complicated set of Toolbox functions and impossible documentation.

In interest of simplicity, the Bozo Manager will exist as Inside Macintosh Vol. 8 and will be precisely five pages (three of which are the copyright page, Table of Contents and Index).

Some of the key functions in the Bozo Manager are as follows:

Procedure JustMakeWindow

This procedure just makes a new window, making it the current GrafPort and the front window. It takes no parameters since it knows you simply want a garden-variety window with a pair of scrollbars and a “grow” box, etc., and of course it is visible and of course it has a go-away box.

JustMakeWindow will always make your window look nice. Note that this procedure does not return a WindowPtr because that would require its structure to be published, hence more complexity and more headaches.

JustMakeWindow is ideal for the beginning Mac programmer because all events are handled for you: when the new window receives an Update event, for instance, your code will be scanned for any "Toolbox routines that draw anything, hence you don't even need to use the Event Manager.

Procedure MeeToo (cloneverb: INTEGER)

The MeeToo procedure lets you create and sell software without writing one single line of code!

This procedure scans the hard drive for an existing application and, once found, launches that program but substitutes your “About” box.

The cloneverb parameter defines which application to launch, which can be one of the following:

MicrosoftClone = 1
AldusClone = 2
ClarisClone = 3

Note that these three verbs should be sufficient for 99% of all “new” software under development.

MeeToo is already being used by many developers but is finally being made available to everyone in the new Bozo Manager. It is an invaluable tool because you can market a fat product for which you entire cost is paying someone to use ResEdit for ten minutes.

We recommend, however, that you pad the file with some dummy “object code,” say 750K or more, as most developers have successfully accomplished.

Procedure UndoSystem (revert: INTEGER)

This procedure un-upgrades the current System software version. The revert parameter indicates which System you wish to revert to.

For example, let's say your application tried to include System 7 features but all of your users bought Mac Classics. Using the Bozo Manager, you could add “Undo System” to your Edit menu, passing it “6.07,” or “4.0,” etc., then at launch time the user can move the System version backwards if necessary.

Another use for UndoSystem is when things aren’t going your way: if all else fails when trying to use Script Manager, Apple Events, Editions Manager, etc. - or when you’ve just plain had it with suspicious bugs or doggy software, UndoSystem can be called directly from your application.

Procedure InitBugFixes

This procedure loads a special package that will cause the processor to do as you intend, not as you say. It’s built-in artificial intelligence will avoid taking your code so literally and will try to do the obvious instructions, just as you intended in the first place.

For example, let’s say your program accidentally states “for u = 1,” but what you really meant was “for i = 1.” If InitBugFixes was called at launch time, the processor knows that everyone uses “i” for loops, not “u,” so it will correct your error.

If for no other reason, the processor will realize that the letter “u” is right next to “i” on the keyboard so it can detect your error fairly easily.

InitBugFixes causes the processor to examine all of your code, determine what you really want to do, and will skip over the obvious mistakes. As a fail-safe measure, if a large piece of buggy code is too hard to figure out, the MeeToo function (above) might be called automatically to launch a similar piece of software, transparent to the user. In this case, the closest clone can be determined by examining your window contents, menu items, etc.

Lastly, when InitBugFixes is first called, a mirror-image of all memory is saved to the hard disk and can be loaded later to restore everything, salvaging an otherwise impossible parade of bugs. This way, the user won’t ever crash no matter how bad it gets.

However, if InitBugFixes is forced to load the memory image as a last-ditch effort, “undo System” is automatically appended to your Edit menu so the user can at least go back to how it was before the upgrade. See UndoSystem, above.

 

Community Search:
MacTech Search:

Software Updates via MacUpdate

Kodi 15.0.beta1 - Powerful media center...
Kodi (was XBMC) is an award-winning free and open-source (GPL) software media player and entertainment hub that can be installed on Linux, OS X, Windows, iOS, and Android, featuring a 10-foot user... Read more
DiskCatalogMaker 6.4.12 - Catalog your d...
DiskCatalogMaker is a simple disk management tool which catalogs disks. Simple, light-weight, and fast. Finder-like intuitive look and feel. Super-fast search algorithm. Can compress catalog data... Read more
Macs Fan Control 1.3.0.0 - Monitor and c...
Macs Fan Control allows you to monitor and control almost any aspect of your computer's fans, with support for controlling fan speed, temperature sensors pane, menu-bar icon, and autostart with... Read more
Lyn 1.5.11 - Lightweight image browser a...
Lyn is a lightweight and fast image browser and viewer designed for photographers, graphic artists and Web designers. Featuring an extremely versatile and aesthetically pleasing interface, it... Read more
NeoOffice 2014.11 - Mac-tailored, OpenOf...
NeoOffice is a complete office suite for OS X. With NeoOffice, users can view, edit, and save OpenOffice documents, PDF files, and most Microsoft Word, Excel, and PowerPoint documents. NeoOffice 3.x... Read more
LaunchBar 6.4 - Powerful file/URL/email...
LaunchBar is an award-winning productivity utility that offers an amazingly intuitive and efficient way to search and access any kind of information stored on your computer or on the Web. It provides... Read more
Remotix 3.1.4 - Access all your computer...
Remotix is a fast and powerful application to easily access multiple Macs (and PCs) from your own Mac. Features Complete Apple Screen Sharing support - including Mac OS X login, clipboard... Read more
DesktopLyrics 2.6.6 - Displays current i...
DesktopLyrics is an application that displays the lyrics of the song currently playing in "iTunes" right on your desktop. The lyrics for the song have to be set in iTunes; DesktopLyrics does nothing... Read more
VOX 2.5.1 - Music player that supports m...
VOX is a beautiful music player that supports many filetypes. The beauty is in its simplicity, yet behind the minimal exterior lies a powerful music player with a ton of features and support for all... Read more
Microsoft Remote Desktop 8.0.18 - Connec...
With Microsoft Remote Desktop, you can connect to a remote PC and your work resources from almost anywhere. Experience the power of Windows with RemoteFX in a Remote Desktop client designed to help... Read more

Biz Builder Delux (Games)
Biz Builder Delux 1.0.0 Device: iOS Universal Category: Games Price: $4.99, Version: 1.0.0 (iTunes) Description: Ah, there's nothing like the rhythmic bustle of a burgeoning business burg... especially when you're the one building it... | Read more »
Auroch Digital is Bringing Back Games Wo...
| Read more »
Carbo - Handwriting in the Digital Age...
Carbo - Handwriting in the Digital Age 1.0 Device: iOS Universal Category: Productivity Price: $3.99, Version: 1.0 (iTunes) Description: | Read more »
Draggy Dead (Games)
Draggy Dead 1.1 Device: iOS Universal Category: Games Price: $.99, Version: 1.1 (iTunes) Description: Ditch your dead end job and take up a rewarding career in Grave Robbing today!Guide the recently deceased to a fun filled life of... | Read more »
Bad Dinos (Games)
Bad Dinos 1.0.0 Device: iOS Universal Category: Games Price: $2.99, Version: 1.0.0 (iTunes) Description: | Read more »
The Apple Watch isn't Great as a Fi...
| Read more »
Show the World What You See With Stre.am...
Live broadcasting is getting popular on mobile devices, which is why you can now get Stre.am, by Infinite Takes. [Read more] | Read more »
PhotoTime's 2.1 Update Adds Apple W...
The latest PhotoTime update is adding even more functionality to the handy photo organizing app. Yep, including Apple Watch support. [Read more] | Read more »
Oh My Glob! Adventure Time Puzzle Quest...
Finn and Jake are taking over D3 Go!'s popular puzzle game series in the upcoming Adventure Time Puzzle Quest. [Read more] | Read more »
Earthcore: Shattered Elements - Tips, Tr...
At first glance, Earthcore: Shattered Elements seems like a rather simple card-battling game. Once you’re introduced to skills that will change quite a bit. Even more so once you start to acquire hero cards. But it’s not so complicated that we... | Read more »

Price Scanner via MacPrices.net

Memorial Day Weekend Sale: New 27-inch 3.3GHz...
Best Buy has the new 27″ 3.3GHz 5K iMac on sale for $1899.99 this weekend. Choose free shipping or free local store pickup (if available). Sale price for online orders only, in-store prices may vary... Read more
OtterBox Maximizes Portability, Productivity...
From the kitchen recipe book to the boarsroom presentation, the OtterBox Agility Tablet System turns tablets into one of the most versatile pieces of handheld technology available. Available now, the... Read more
Launch of New Car App Gallery and Open Develo...
Automatic, a company on a mission to bring the power of the Internet into every car, has announced the launch of the Automatic App Gallery, an app store for nearly every car or truck on the road... Read more
Memorial Day Weekend Sale: 13-inch 1.6GHz Mac...
Best Buy has the new 13″ 1.6GHz/128GB MacBook Air on sale for $849 on their online store this weekend. Choose free shipping or free local store pickup (if available). Sale price for online orders... Read more
Memorial Day Weekend Sale: 27-inch 3.5GHz 5K...
Best Buy has the 27″ 3.5GHz 5K iMac on sale for $2099.99 this weekend. Choose free shipping or free local store pickup (if available). Sale price for online orders only, in-store prices may vary.... Read more
Sale! 16GB iPad mini 3 for $349, save $50
B&H Photo has the 16GB iPad mini 3 WiFi on sale for $349 including free shipping plus NY sales tax only. Their price is $50 off MSRP, and it’s the lowest price available for this model. Read more
Price drop on 2014 15-inch Retina MacBook Pro...
B&H Photo has dropped prices on 2014 15″ Retina MacBook Pros by $200. Shipping is free, and B&H charges NY sales tax only: - 15″ 2.2GHz Retina MacBook Pro: $1799.99 save $200 - 15″ 2.5GHz... Read more
With a Mission to Make Mobile Free, Scratch W...
Scratch Wireless, claiming to be the world’s first truly free mobile service, has announced the availability of a new Scratch-enabled Android smartphone, the Coolpad Arise. The smartphone is equipped... Read more
First-Ever Titanium Alloy Curved iPhone 6 Scr...
One of the most common problems with mobile phones is damage to the screens. The slightest drop can cause a dreaded spider web of gashes and cracks in the glass panel surface that can cost $hundreds... Read more
Preorder new 12-inch MacBook, $10 off, save o...
Adorama has new 12″ Retina MacBooks available for preorder for $10 off MSRP including free shipping plus NY & NJ sales tax only. For a limited time, Adorama will include a free Apple USB-C to USB... Read more

Jobs Board

*Apple* Solutions Consultant - Retail Sales...
**Job Summary** As an Apple Solutions Consultant (ASC) you are the link between our customers and our products. Your role is to drive the Apple business in a retail Read more
*Apple* TV Live Streaming Frameworks Test En...
**Job Summary** Work and contribute towards the engineering of Apple 's state-of-the-art products involving video, audio, and graphics in Interactive Media Group (IMG) at Read more
*Apple* Retail - Multiple Positions (US) - A...
Sales Specialist - Retail Customer Service and Sales Transform Apple Store visitors into loyal Apple customers. When customers enter the store, you're also the Read more
Partner Marketing Manager, Merchant- *Apple*...
**Job Summary** The Apple Pay partner marketing team is looking for a marketing manager to develop and drive US marketing programs with our merchant partners. The right Read more
Technical Project Manager - *Apple* Pay - A...
**Job Summary** Apple Pay is seeking an experienced technical PM to…manage the on boarding of new merchants for the Apple Pay platform in the US Within this role you Read more
All contents are Copyright 1984-2011 by Xplain Corporation. All rights reserved. Theme designed by Icreon.